Celebration of Life

Moving beyond my pain and celebrating life.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

"The Happiest Place on Earth ....Where Dreams Come True."

This is a picture of what the suites look like at my hotel in Orlando. It's a very nice room on the 17th floor. Yesterday after the conference, I was resting my back and something out on the patio caught my eye; it was black and flapping in the wind. It was also pecking on the window!At first I thought it was someone sitting out there on the chair but as I peeked around the drapes, I could see it was a bird. It sat about 18 inches high, was pure black like a crow but had a very long beak, about 8 inches long. It sat on the chair in shelter from the storm for a very long time. (For those of you that haven't heard, Hurricane Noel is off the coastline.)

So here I am in the place where all my dreams are supposed to come true, the happiest place on earth and that got me to thinking about the meaning of happiness.

To me, happiness is not an external place where there are fake castles and fake characters who are ready to take your hard earned money and keep on smiling at you but a place internal. My "happiest place on earth" is in my heart where I have found contentment, a place where happy memories of my life, children, grandchildren and family resides. Externally, there will always be hurricanes looming, big mysterious visitors wanting in and characters wanting your money but inside there is shelter from the storm and enough love to last a lifetime!

Friday, October 26, 2007

We are off....

Chuck and I are off to Orlando, Florida this morning. Chuck is a little nervous about flying but I think once he is in the air he will be okay. He still has his busy bag that his Aunt Ellie made him when we went to D.C. so I think he will be fine.
Unfortunately, this is a working trip and there will not be much time if any for sightseeing but, I hope to have a little time where I can shop for relatives who collect things and of course there is always shopping for the grand daughters!
We will be gone a week so if I don't visit your blogs or comment on mine, you will know that I am not ignoring you but am very busy.
In just a couple of weeks, I will be taking vacation in Arizona. Although it hasn't been very cold here lately, I am looking forward to the warm sunshine and relaxation there.
See you all on the flipside!

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

River of Pain.....

There is a song that Trisha Yearwood sings called: "River of You". I have paraphrased the words to relate an incident that happened to me this year:

Everybody knew, he was not good for me, the way he broke my heart again and again...

Before I knew it, I was too close… One sweet look and then he pulled me under with a touch that’s like no other, falling in the river again...

I’m drifting, drowning, there’s nothing I can do but fall into the river of pain again....

I thought I saw love’s reflection just to feel his cold rejection ....

Every tear adds to the water that I kept drowning in; even I knew I was a fool
reckless fool for him ... I kept him close like I had nothing to lose ...
The phrase: Every tear adds to the water that I kept drowning in made a substantial impact on me.
One day, it finally dawned on me that it was my own tears that I was drowning in and in order to stop drowning, I had to stop crying and in order to stop crying I had to remove myself from the person who hurt me like no other. So I did. It wasn't as easy as that; it wasn't easy at all. Eventually, I could stop crying to stop the flow, standup and walk away. I became a stronger person because of it or inspite of it. I am in control of my own emotions and my own life. Yoohoo!

Monday, October 22, 2007

Bridges of Life.....

My special friend gave me this picture of a bridge in Yellowstone Park; I think it is awesome! At looking at the engineering and construction of this bridge, I started thinking about the bridges in my life and how I have crossed them.

The last two years, I have had to cross many bridges. Why do we have bridges and where do they come from? I have concluded that bridges are all apart of life. After all, if I didn't have a bridge to take me from one rough place to another, I may end up in the muck and mire or in some place where there is only ragged rocks to scale.

Bridges span the gaps we have to travel along life's path. They are engineered for specific purposes and made of different materials. Some bridges are easy to cross while others like swinging bridges are scary. No matter how easy or scary they are, they have to be crossed in order to continue on your life path.

May you find your bridges to be easy on your life's path.


Saturday, October 20, 2007

Family Tree....

I know I have posted these pictures before but I wanted to elaborate on the concept of our Family Tree and what it means to me.

A tree is only as strong as its roots and the ground where it is planted. Our family tree was started by two young couples starting two large families. From those two families came my mother and father. Their love started their own family tree of six girls. Of those six branches, one was completely severed where there will be no future off spring, November 24, 1990.

On my branch of the 'family tree', there were two branches, my daughter and son. From my daughter's branch there are two precious seedlings and one on the way. I am very proud of my branches of our family tree.

Some of the wisdom I learned from the roots of our family tree:
  • Integrity
  • Honesty
  • Pay your bills and establish good credit
  • Love your family
  • Sacrifice is not a dirty word

Some of the wisdom I hope to pass along:

  • Integrity
  • Honesty
  • Establish good credit
  • Love your family and be loyal
  • Scrifice
  • Pay it forward (then you don't have to ever pay back)
  • Laugh at yourself and laugh often
  • Live as if it were your last day on earth
  • Love with all of your heart even if there is a chance of getting hurt
  • Learn to communicate well
  • Enjoy the sweetness of life



Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Landmarks of Life...

When you walk in the snow, you leave footprints until the wind blows more snow on top of where you walked or the snowmelts and leaves no trace of where you have been.

Memories are the footprints of time in my mind. The prints of the past two years are still evident in my mind as I sit here at my computer even though the winds of change are starting to take the edges off and they are not as crisp and clear as they once were.

It has been two years this day that my beloved Leo took his own life. I may never know what he was thinking or the reason for his senseless act but, I do know that he must have been in so much pain that he could not tell even me, his best friend, his wife. With that senseless act he caused more pain than he will ever know to those who knew him and loved him. In the wake of his death, I have traveled down a long and windy road. I haven't always walked alone; I have had my family and my dear friends with me.

As I have walked, I passed landmarks of my life and I have left foot prints. I have made mistakes, I have stumbled but most importantly I have picked myself up and kept on going because I am a survivor. This much I know is true... the path I have chosen to take is my choice, I am accountable only to myself; I am my own person.

I can only hope that when I have reached the end of my journey others will look at the land marks I have left behind and say "you have done well."

This is my wish for you today: May you find happiness in your life, may you find enough love that it takes the edge off your pain and may you find joy in my smile.


Monday, October 15, 2007

Life is to be celebrated....

The earth has a way of renewing itself....

You can see evidence of that wherever you look....

The old has memories of its life but still nourishes the new....

With the young comes the hope and dreams of a new generation and better things to come!